Nov 11, 2005

Preaching the naked truth in L.A.

Sitting naked on a rock on a Mexican beach, L.A.'s most famous deacon found God

"A few years ago I was in Puerto Vallarta with a group of friends. We were waiting to be seated in a restaurant. It was loud, everyone was talking and laughing, and I wasn’t in that space. Little things about my friends started bugging me, and I felt a great sense of unease. So I excused myself and took a cab back to the resort.

It was about midnight, and I was walking on the private beach trying to figure out why I felt so upset. My stomach was in knots, my heart was beating fast. I tried to categorize and analyze the many little imagined offenses I was harboring, wanting to free myself from all this pettiness amid the crashing and roaring of the ocean.

Then, I don’t know why, I took off my clothes and sat on a rock at the edge of the waves. I sat there for a long time, with the waves sometimes crashing over my shoulders and sometimes only wetting my toes. I looked out at the dark waters. And I realized that the ocean is like the love of God."

Homily for Trinity Sunday 2005 by Deacon Eric Stoltz. Stoltz is a successful website developer. Go HERE to see some of the sites he has designed and HERE for a photo of the good deacon fully clothed.


Anonymous Linda said...

OMG - I have to barf!

11:29 PM  
Blogger Saint Johns Army said...

That man need to shut up and put his dam pants back on! Either that or he needs a good spanking with a belt on his bare butt!


5:03 AM  
Blogger Scarlette said...

Ok, now I have to get rid of that gross image in my mind:
Find my happy place...find my happy place...

8:03 AM  
Anonymous Truman said...

How is it that priests and deacons in LA get away with saying such stupid things in homilies?

8:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I recall a show of Archbishop Fulton Sheen and he was speaking about the demonic and he pointed to scripture and noted that the demoniac took his clothes off and then went on to speak about an evil that revels in taking off the clothes. There is something wrong with those who wish to disrobe in public. There is something very wrong here.

That man needs to be removed from teh deaconate. Is there a real MAN, a real shepherd anywhere to do it?

8:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

There are no bad homilies in the Archdiocese of Los Angeles. There are no liturgical abuses either.
We are church, we are vibrant, and we are dynamic!
And our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters are the most wonderful, caring, and giving persons I've ever met.

Why are you people so obsessed with Rome?
This is L.A., baby!

Roger M.

8:55 AM  
Blogger Quo Vadis said...

I don't mind his analogy, he is not the first person to compare God's mercy to the ocean. But he could have arived at the same conclusion with his clothes on.

Did he name that one "What I did on my Club Med style vaction in Mexico"?

11:11 AM  
Anonymous Bede said...

This is so ... pitiful. Papa Benedict, do something quick!

3:29 PM  
Anonymous Chelsee said...

Why would anyone in his right mind post this homily on the internet? It is just so hackneyed and silly.

Naked on a rock he found God. Too bad he didn't find God's big tow, as in undertow.

Mahony's archdiocese is a laughing stock! What an embarrassment to the Church. The guy's got to go.

3:33 PM  
Blogger skeetor said...

its not just LA here in louisville, ky. were gettin as bad. with the "festival of faiths" coming up this month, and the constant classes like astrological yoga being offered I'm suprised I haven't lost my lunch when I get near the cathedrial.

check it out if you want.

4:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Why would anyone post this homily on the internet?"

For the reaction he knows he will surely provoke. It is his way of attaining pleasure. Perverted, yes, that is the WHOLE point.

10:57 PM  
Blogger C S said...

It might have helped if you posted the begining of his "homily" to contrast with the nude scene

"I’ve noticed that on Trinity Sunday there is sometimes an inclination to explain the Trinity. I don’t think we need that."

Hmm yeah, to talk about the Trinity or talk about nudist meditation, hmm what a difficult choice!

9:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, we can hardly blame the poor gay, guy. The blame goes to the bozo who ordained him: Cardinal (can it be?) Roger M. Mahony.

How long, O Lord, must we suffer with this idiot as AB of LA???

10:28 AM  
Anonymous Maria said...

With Deacon Stoltz around, how does Mahony plan to, as he and so many of the US bishops say, "keep the Church safe for children."

First, the fact that he disrobed in the first place suggests some psychological instability.

Second, the fact that he would share this in a homily, presumably with children present, is scandalous.

The LA archdiocese is a hell hole thanks to RMM.

When the whole thing blows up in Mahony's face sooner or later, what a mess his successor will have to clean up.

I say that B-16 should fire the guy immediately.

10:39 AM  
Blogger Scarlette said...

Seeker posted the first part so I'll go ahead and post the very intellegent, deep, meaningful, and profound last part:
"Maybe it’s more important to experience the Trinity.
Even in a peanut butter and jelly sandwich".

Mid-way is this gem:
"And it occurred to me that we are called to jump into the ocean and let the water carry us where it will."

You first, Eric.

1:50 PM  
Blogger Quintero said...

That would make for a very soggy peanut butter and jelly sandwich, Scarlette!

Oh well. The water's fine, come on in.

2:18 PM  
Blogger Dymphna said...

I just think it's sad this guy has to get naked in public in order to have a deep thought.

2:25 PM  
Anonymous Linda said...

When did Mahoney become Cardinal?

4:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


5:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous 10:28 AM..

Your question:
"How long, O Lord, must we suffer with this idiot as AB of LA???"

Well, according to my Cardinal Mahony Retirement Counter,
exactly 5 years, 3 months, and 14 days. That's when he turns 75 and submits his mandatory resignation. I would assume he'd be booted out the door at that time.

The date could be much sooner if the District Attorney decides to indict him.

5:30 PM  
Blogger bobnd said...

1991 as Cardinal, 1985 as Archbishop of LA. Remember Mahoney, was actually a decent bishop at one time, but he pulled a Judas

1:23 AM  

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