On the First Sunday of Advent, St. Bede's Father Kester offered his parishioners a moderately entertaining but completely pointless "illustration" of the parable of the talents.
Two weeks before this "homily", Kester had distributed six envelopes containing differing amounts of money: $1, $2, $5, $10, $20, $50. On this particular Sunday, he asked for an accounting.
A young man named Russell had received $5 and he reports to Father Kester that he made $53. This news is greeted with raucous applause.
Father Kester, chortling, says, "Alright! You want to tell us what you did, please, for the Kingdom?"
He calls Russell up to the microphone and the young man says, "I took $5 and bought a deck of cards and I did some card tricks around the block and I got like $34 in tips and stuff ."
He hesitates for a moment and then continues, "This is the bad part. I took $15 and bought a gift certificate to Paymon's Ice Cream and sold $1 raffle tickets [for a trip down to Paymon's Ice Cream in a BMW Z3]".
Father Kester responds, "I have to bring my BMW Z3 here? The parish isn't supposed to know that I own a Z3 [wild laughter]. I bought it with money I inherited from my father [more audience laughter]. So I'm taking somebody in my Z3 to get ice cream?" "Yeah," says Russell.
"Okay," says Kester resignedly, amid more cacophonous laughter. "Let's give him a hand."
At the end of this "little experiment," as he calls it, Father Kester, continuing to chuckle, says, "Okay. Please stand for our Creed."
For a ride almost as wild as a ride in Kester's Z3, go HERE.
My people perish for want of knowledge! Since you have rejected knowledge, I will reject you from my priesthood; Since you have ignored the law of your God, I will also ignore your sons. One and all they sin against me, exchanging their glory for shame. They feed on the sin of my people, and are greedy for their guilt. The priests shall fare no better than the people: I will punish them for their ways, and repay them for their deeds. They shall eat but not be satisfied, they shall play the harlot but not increase, Because they have abandoned the LORD to practice harlotry. (Hosea 4:6ff)